Saturday, September 27, 2008

24. Magpies :Z

Magpies.
My Worst fear. Well, one of my worst fears. I'm not trying to seek attention, or just to 'fit in', because i mean seriously. Who else is scared of Magpies? Apart from myself and Nikki... It sucks. I didn't choose to have this fear. I didn't choose to make the Magpies the worst bird species EVER! Grrrr. This is why I want to move to like Canada or some other place. Far away from this mad psycho bird infested country. They make horrible clicking noises as if to say 'I'm gonna swoop the shit outta you and you'll probably die because we are the shittiest most scaryfull birds in the world... Well, Australia. They won't let us go international because we are so SHIT!!'. I hate that noise. It makes we wanna run into the nearest bush and sulk with tree leaves in my eyeballs with blood pissing out everywhere. Pretty sure I'd prefer that over being swooped. I remember getting swooped one time. Worst day of my life...I remember it like it was yesterday.. That's right. I'm going deep. *flask back* It was actually a very sunny, beautiful day. I was riding my bike along our local pedophile filled bike track (Mmmm. Tempting. Isn't it?) when out of no where a freaking gay of a bird decides to come and maul me with its pointy as beak and scary as claws. So scary. Then me being brave and shit, I kinda screamed my way out of that park area onto a road where all the way home I as looking over my shoulder, real paranoid I tells you. Real Paranoid. OMG i love Paramore. Magpies are so shit. Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit. Well, that saved my like three lines of complaining about how SHIT MAGPIES ARE! unless you want me to continue? What was that young Jimmy? Continue? Are you sure? I may get sued. Okay then... Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit.Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit.Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit.Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit.Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit.Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit. That should do for now :)
Thanks for reading... not that you had any choice. The magpies made you do it didn't they? DIDN'T THEY!!! *Gasp*
xoxo d:)

2 comments:

Erica Hoffman said...

omg! laugh attack.
the most funnyest thing ive read eva.

TheRaidstar said...

BEST BLOG EVAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!